Guru Bars - a graphic manipulation by T Newfields based on a drawing by his mother, Jean Price Norman

Guru Bars

Gurus are perfect contradictions
with tantalizing incongruities.

If reality seems too bland
or life lacks sufficient flavor
why not try a Guru BarTM or
for an experience that can be savored?

Guru BarsTM come in many sizes
and are sold in countless ways –
check your local yoga newsletter
or visit India
for a mind-dazzling display.

Experience transcendental bliss:
find a guru fresh 'n crisp
bringing a shakti-flavor
to aspirants who savor
a sweetness
out ah dis world!
.
Chariya: (with chagrin) Gurus are not market commodities!
Daiki: (nonchalantly) Well, isn't everything in dis world fer sale?
Chariya: Perhaps, but a true guru is not in this world. Their body is here, but consciousness elsewhere. Don't you realize that?
Daiki: (chuckling) Nope, but I do realize there are a lot of charlatans! Not all people in saffron robes or running ashrams deserve to be called true gurus. Con artists abound.
Chariya: (sighing) In that case what can I say? Enjoy your candy bars…