GRADE INFLATION: A Short Confessional

	With a heap of papers
	& limited time
	how can I churn out grades
	without provoking whines?

	Should I pretend
	effort alone counts –
	or be honest & acknowledge
	ignorance if it's pronounced?

	When dealing with such questions
	it's best seek the advice of an aged expert:
	Jim Beam!

		[1 hr. & a few shots of whisky later]

	Okay – back to the business of grading!

		[clearing throat while leaning on a chair]

	Well, this attempt at erudition looks like an "A"
	& perhaps this gibberish is a "B".

		[shuffling the papers randomly]

	These poor constructions are mediocre –
	doesn't that translate into a "C"?

		[Gerping loudly while dealing with a particularly odious paper]

	This piece of plagiarism deserves an "F"
	& this document is so lame
	that nobody sober could give it a passing grade.

		[Pausing in reflection, then clearing throat]

	Wait a minute!
	If I grade too strictly won't my teacher evaluations fall?
	Isn't it safer to give lots of "B"s
	so any criticism can be stalled?

		[swishing another glass of whiskey while gazing at a stack of papers]

	Even if most papers are trash
	shouldn't I play it safe?
	The less people bitch,
	the more time I can devote to
	my literary itch:
	& don't students adore high grades?


Liao:    (shuddering) I detest spineless teachers like this!

Tim:     Hey, don't blame the instructors. The whole educational system is 
         dysfunctional. Most teachers are simply ordinary jerks who are 
         trying to get by creating as little trouble as possible.

Melissa: Perhaps we should question the whole notion of grading. Is there 
        really any need to churn out A,B,Cs in a system that rewards mediocracy?


=====================================================================================
from _Crassroom Voices - Poetry, Art, & Dialogs about Education_ by T Newfields
SUMMARY:  A tirade about the validity of academic grading.
KEYWORDS: academic assessment, inflated grades, subjective marking, teacher burn out

Author: T Newfields [Nitta Hirou / Huáng Yuèwǔ] (b. 1955)
Begun: 2011 in Shizuoka, Japan  / Finished: 2020 in Shizuoka, Japan
Creative Commons License: Attribution. {{CC-BY-4.0}} Granted

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